Lyrics Database

As I Lay Dying "Shadows Are Security" Special Edition

(including extended liner notes & song meanings by vocalist Tim Lambesis)

November 24th, 2007, by Tobe


As I Lay Dying "Shadows Are Security" Special Edition CD/DVD Digipack 
 
01. Meaning In Tragedy
02. Confined
03. Losing Sight
04. The Darkest Nights
05. Empty Hearts
06. Reflection
07. Repeating Yesterday
08. Through Struggle
09. The Truth Of My Perception
10. Control Is Dead
11. Morning Waits
12. Illusions
 
Special Edition CD/DVD Digipack w/ extended artwork
 Buy it on Amazon USA, Canada, UK or Germany/Austria
 
 
01. Meaning In Tragedy
 
I have traveled so far to find so little
Meaning in tragedy or tragedy in the search for meaning
Dark clouds have lead me here
Confined freedom guides us to security
 
What if everything I have been taught is a lie?
And all my teachers have been wrong this whole time?
 
Compelling us to fight the battles they would not
They have already won and we have already lost
If we do not learn from their mistakes
We have already lost
If we do not learn to change
 
I thought that I was done writing lyrics for the record when Meaning in Tragedy became a song. Since I’d covered everything that I wanted to conceptually, this song challenged me to look at the album from an outside perspective.

There are so many resolute thoughts expressed throughout the other songs, so I decided to write about the initial journey that inspired the lyrics to come. The title Meaning in Tragedy gives hope that reflecting upon our past experiences can ultimately lead us to change for the better.

Lines like “confined freedom guides us to security” help identify that fact that we are comfortable being told what to do and believe as long as we are somehow manipulated into thinking we had a choice. We are comfortable when the idea of truth is put right in front of us because we all want to know the answers to our questions, but we don’t have the discipline to find the answers for ourselves. Therefore, most of us accept things as truth that have never been questioned. We are told what to think and are happily guided into our place in life because we have the illusion that we made a free choice.

Life often requires our utmost passion and courage to fight the battles we will face. This courage is not worth being spent on an agenda that has been past down by generations of those who are already misguided.
 
 
02. Confined

That night I never came home
Wandering souls captured my thoughts
Emptiness filled my mind
Urgency spoke her lies
in the confines of these grey walls
 
I watched them move together
Taking me places I cannot remember
We have been poured out into a loveless bride
 
How quickly I forget that this is meaninglessness
 
In a world passing through my fingers
I still chase the wind
What have I learned from yesterday?
 
In this song “home” is a place of purpose and vision. This song is about losing that sense of purpose and being caught up in the meaningless things of this life, like materialism and the temporary emotions that control our thoughts and actions. As easily as I identify these meaningless things, I often catch myself being emptied into these passionless desires. There is such a strong sense of urgency for everything that we do in life, but how many of these urgent tasks will last long enough to justify our efforts?
 
I began to ask myself that same question while looking out the window beyond the grey walls of our tour van. There are so many places we have gone that I will never forget, but that same van has taken me to countless cities in pursuit of what I will never be able to take with me beyond this life.
 
 
03. Losing Sight
 
How could we lose sight of what matters most?
Trying to love what cannot love us back
All we have is not worth living for
If we do not know when to let go
 
What is this life that we cling to it so tight
Afraid that it will take from us these fading sentiments?
 
Can we die to live another day?
 
Lyrically this song is very short and one of the most straight forward. It builds on the idea established in Confined that we need to reevaluate what really matters in life. In addition to recognizing what is meaningless, the song was a way for me to come to grips with that fact that I need to let go of the vain things that I cling to. Letting go and becoming dead to my selfish desires and emotions is something that I will always have a hard time doing, but I know that it is with this death that I will truly experience the life I was designed for.
 
 
04. The Darkest Nights
 
For so long I have felt alone
Content to live with unrest
Longing faded into countless nights
That buried my weary heart
But You brought an end
To this dead hour
And meaning to a calloused life
Held in Your arms
But too far away from my heart
These thoughts will carry me
Through the darkest nights
While Your eyes rest in mine
I remember the way You looked at me
And the way You drew me close
With one deep sigh
Scattering pieces of my restless mind
Forgetting all that we have left behind
 
The Darkest Nights is the first of two climactic points in the concept of the record. It is during this song that I have been able to fall in love and pour my heart out into something of worth, but it is the very emotional side of love that this song describes. Regardless, it is this love that was initially able to save me.
 
Knowing how much of this life is meaningless, I experienced a deep sense of sorrow wondering what is worthwile for my heart to pursue. This song describes a feeling that is very momentary but nonetheless provided a memory that was capable of giving me hope through the dark times that would follow.
 
 
05. Empty Hearts
 
I’ve watched them build upon these empty hearts
False hopes of lossless paradise
Gathering together
The dead hearts beat as one
 
Stillborn comfort feeding lies
Through answers of self denial
Divided between a dissolute self
And the sorrow of sincere devotion
 
What is it that you find peace in now?
Where is your hope in this dark night?
 
This song very directly deals with the false belief that love can be experienced without sacrifice. “Lossless paradise” describes our modern sense of love, which is achieving selfish fulfillment without commitment or sacrifice. It is a search that leaves us feeling empty while we will look anywhere but to ourselves in efforts to solve this impossible combination.
 
I was divided between a dissolute self and the sacrificial sometimes sorrow-filled devotion that is required for true love. In the end, the answer became simple when I asked myself which one will last. Which form of love will still be there when the dark night passes though?
 
 
06. Reflection
 
I laid the night before me
Unraveled the tangles of my heart
All I felt was stale hollow air
 
These streams of uncertainty
They are collapsing upon my mind
Torments fill my veins until I burst
With mistaken guilt and shame
 
My battered bones try to keep fighting
Against this endless ocean of self defeat
 
As time goes on
Some months are yet to pass
 
Puddles of ink surround this tired chair
All of my sorrow has been spilled
Into my reflection
 
Reflection describes the dark night that the previous two songs refer to. It is my best effort to write down every emotion that I felt during that time. Even now, the lyrics seem to be the only accurate description I can offer.
 
In the end, everything I felt was the result of the world I had created for myself through selfish living and a lack of sincere sacrificial love.
 
 
07. Repeating Yesterday

This is what I am
This is what I have become
Repeating yesterday
Drain me of my very essence
To form again what lasts
 
This is what I am
This is what I have become
What is love without sacrifice?
My tears hold no weight
If my commitment is only failure
Each day I...
 
Repeat yesterday
 
Each day I am born again to be a child in the eyes of love
 
Drain me of my very essence
To form again what lasts
 
This is what I am
This is what I have become
What is love without...
 
It was a very humbling process for me to realize how true these words had become. However, I was finally at a point where I recognized what I needed to do in order to fully love. It wasn’t the modern self-gratifying emotion I had seen in the movies. It was a total removal of myself and the formation of something new.
 
 
08. Through Struggle
 
Only through struggle have I found rest
With a piece of me taken away
I begin to understand
 
Hollow out this machine like chest
With it’s gears that turn to make me feel
And assembled thoughts that fade away
Remove from me this deception I called love
 
Through Struggle represents a very positive point in the concept of the record. While writing this song I was able to understand that growth starts by first removing what holds us back. My heart was like a machine that ran on feeling. There was the problem. Feeling is no more love than excitement is dedication. True love involves commitment and sacrifice. Which are two things that seldom exist when emotions have past.
 
 
09. The Truth Of My Perception
 
While shutters enclose the boundaries of my heart
I hold my breath till the steady beating is shut out
In silence I wait for what is real
For I know the truth of my perceptions
Nothing in life matters more than You
When first feelings fade
I will still be here
 
Our emotions can be like a windowless room that closes in almost forcing us to think or act a certain way. This song is about waiting for clarity when those feelings are gone. Often, positive emotions give us motivation to love, but, in the end, that should not be the only reason we do what is right. When first feelings fade, I hope that I will still love with sincerity and devotion.
 
 
10. Control Is Dead (feat. guest vocals by Dan Weyandt of ZAO)
 
Control is dead in this blind world
For we do what we hate
Split from inside
Betrayed by emotion
We must look past what is in front of us
Shadows are security
 
They have become the solace of my looking glass heart
In search for certainty, I no longer need control
 
Take me through the fire, refine what is Yours
It is time to overcome this
We must look past what is in front of us
 
The closing line in The Truth of My Perception shows a strong sense of confidence and determination. But, while we all want to believe that we can control our every action, there are times in our lives when we fail despite our greatest efforts. Selfishness is so ingrained in our hearts that we often settle for what is easy or what feels secure for the moment. The phrase “Shadows are Security” comes from this song. Shadows are easy to identify but they are always changing. Like emotions they are with us one minute and gone the next. This song is about overcoming our temporary and false sense of security.
 
 
11. Morning Waits
 
All along it was me who changed
Morning now waits for me
What I have to gain does not matter
If what I give is all to You
 
I have seen the stars full
And the sun rise again
But You are yet to change
You are all that is worth living for
 
Morning Awaits was originally going to be the last song on the album. It is a testament to God’s faithfulness despite my own. After everything I have learned, I now know it was always me who needed to change and God who was always faithful.
 
 
12. Illusions (feat. guest vocals by Jason Moody of No Innocent Victim)
 
How could I ever go back…
Back to the life where I lived amongst the dead
Those who have forgotten how to feel
And become slaves to memory and wishful thinking
But Your love has set me free
as You’ve awakend every star
That has been sleeping in the constellation of my soul

How could I go back to live amongst the dead
Those who imprisoned beauty
I never want to leave Your arms
So I wait in hope for Your embrace

Illusions of what I thought was love
Now I have clear sight to see
I’ve left nothing behind
 
This song fits well at the end of the concept because it is very retrospective. Looking back on all of the meaningless thing I had left behind it makes sense to ask the question, “how could I go back to live amongst the dead?”
 
CLOSING 
I have made so many mistakes in my life and done so many things that have hurt those closest to me. I understand that God does not only love me because he feels like it, which makes me all the more amazed by His perfect example. God’s love is an absolute commitment to me despite my rejection of Him. It is beyond temporary thoughts and feelings and straight to what counts… Forever sacrificing for those you love.
 
 
Behind the Scenes: Unknown facts about the music
 
Previous to Shadows are Security, we had only demoed a few songs before recording a full record. This time, we decided to do an entire pre-production with the exception of Meaning in Tragedy. The songs were recorded a number of different ways including the use of an eight track in my loft at home.
 
Meaning in Tragedy was the last song written for the record. We actually wrote it while we were in the studio tracking drums and decided it was a strong opener because the song had very immediate energy. Phil had written the main riff months earlier, but we’d always thought of it played differently. Once the idea came to mind for the riff to be more driving and aggressive I went home and came up with a new arrangement and direction for the song. My personal favorite riff is at the end of the song.
 
Confined was originally supposed to be the opening song on Shadows are Security.
 
The original outro to Repeating Yesterday was written on guitar. In the studio Phil decided to play it on piano.
 
Through Struggle was the first song Jordan and I wrote with the new members. Phil and I each had a handful of riffs and the ideas I had were made much better on guitar by Phil and Nick. Previous to Through Struglle and Shadows are Security the songwriting process was somewhat scattered and I often had to fill in the role of guitar player. Jordan and I would both write riffs yet neither of us were the guitar player. After wrting this song with the band I was able to sept out a little more to focus on lyrics and arrangement.
 
We had never heard Nick’s solo played with the whole band on The Truth of My Perception until we tracked it in the studio.
 
Since Control is Dead is less melodic than most of the songs on the record, we wanted more vocal variation. Zao was on tour during the time and happened to play near San Diego while we were tracking vocals. Dan Weyandt was the perfect voice for the part and a good friend of ours from previous tours we had done together. His timing was perfect and he nailed his parts in only a couple takes.
 
We spent more time discussing the key changes in Morning Waits than we did any other transition on the record.
 
Jason Moody from No Innocent Victim was a guest vocalist on Illusions. When I was growing up, he was one of my biggest influences vocally so it was an honor to have him come in. Also, since this song first appeared on our out of print Pluto Records EP, I wanted to do something different for this recording.
 
Lyrics & liner notes by Tim Lambesis
 
 
Further facts (as posted on August 3rd, 2007 on the band’s MySpace blog):
 
Our first recordings, "Frail Words Collapse", and "Shadows are Security" were all written and recorded without Clint [Norris, former bass player], so the new CD [“An Ocean Between Us”] isn’t any different in that respect. Although Clint was in the band during "Shadows are Security" and we will always be thankful for his great live energy, he was not involved in the songwriting process. Therefore, he had a hard time learning the songs in short amount of time we had while recording. Phil ended up playing bass, and our friend Dave Arthur (who is in an amazing band called Kings to You) did a guest vocal appearance on all of the clean singing.
 
 
Guest appearances:

Jason Moody appears courtesy of No Innocent Victim and Facedown Records
Daniel Weyandt appears courtesy of Zao and Ferret Records
Matt Mentley appears courtesy of Throwdown and Trustkill Records
Dave Arthur appears courtesy of himself
Tommy Garcia appears courtesy of Please Mr. Gravedigger and Pluto Records
 
 
As I Lay Dying ""Shadows Are Security" Special Edition CD/DVD Digipack

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